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Sweet Tea & Day Dreams

June 27, 2013

Thoughts from a Formula Feeding Mom

I formula-fed my baby. And, I’m not ashamed of it. I never wanted to breastfeed and, though I did try it, it didn’t work out well for us. Lucy lost weight, and I didn’t enjoy it or feel like I bonded any more with her than I would have if I bottle fed her. So, I stopped.

And, it was the best thing ever for us. I was happier. I was more rested. And, in turn, she was happier!

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Yesterday, a Facebook “friend” posted an anti-formula rant, going so far as calling those who bottle feed their children “selfish”. I try not to let the opinions of those who differ from me bother me, but this really did – perhaps because she really was insulting those who use formula and insinuating that they’re not as good of mothers.

And that, my friends, is wrong on SO many levels. I wasn’t comfortable with breastfeeding. Doe that mean I judge those who are or criticize them for being “gross”? No. Although, I will say I would prefer if moms would use nursing covers when out in public, like at church.

What happened to supporting fellow moms? What happened to every woman being able to make a decision for her and her child without being chastised? There is so much “mommy guilt” out there, and it’s not cool to add to that by telling someone they made the “wrong” choice as to how to feed their baby. And, it’s just as wrong to tell them their selfish or are a bad mom. Formula-feeding doesn’t make you selfish or lazy. Period.

If I’m being honest, this kind of judgmental reaction is one reason why I never really talked much about my failed attempt at breastfeeding. I didn’t want the pressure of people possibly telling me that I just needed to keep going or judging me for giving my child formula. And, it’s sad that, because of society, I have to feel that way.

I don’t think I’m alone, and I hope I’m not. I’m proud of feeding my child formula and, if we are blessed with a second, we will be feeding that one formula as well. It’s what’s best for our family, and it doesn’t make me a bad mom.

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